Wouldn't it be nice to be able to know what challenges you are going to face in your life? In some circumstances it would be nice to know early in order to prepare for them. In others, you may not want to know ahead of time what you may be facing.
I have thought about specifically journaling this difficult journey in our lives to be able to have record of the up's and down's and look back on it one day to learn from it and also to just remember. This is a small entry to begin this process.
Logan and I have had our fair share of challenges lately. I never would have thought I would be exhausting all of my medical options in order to start a family--to be blessed with just one child. I'll be honest, it'scompetely exhausting and heartbreaking. I'm tired, Logan's tired and yet, hope still exists because we have been comforted by our loving Savior. So...pile on the challenges, because whatever doesn't kill us will only make us stronger--individually and as a couple.
We have had a handful of doctors appointments recently to figure out what it would take to move forward in this process. After two years of trying, seven cycles of Clomid and two seperate IUI treatments that have all been unsuccessful, we needsomething more agressive. We are willing to work, sacrifice and pay thousands more for only a 50-60% rate of success. People often tell me it'll be worth it. And, we know that it will, but it is different when it is your body, your time away from work and your bank account that suffers. Additionally, the behind the scene stressors that most people don't have a clue about add up very quickly and make this process one of the most difficult. Everything encompassed, it is a HUGE committment physically and monetarily.
I asked Logan to fast with me the other day to get an answer to our prayers. We were under the gun to make some decisions and can I not tell you what peace I have felt since then. Our prayers have been answered and decisions made--decisions that we know are right.
My faith grows a little more each day knowing that we have our Heavenly Father on our side. I know that he would never give us something we couldn't handle. And, in the end our happiness will only be that much sweeter.
